Letter to an Ex (February 2002 - I was in 8th Grade)

          Dear Franky [yes, that was his real name unfortunately],

                  I called your house (or the one you used to live in), but you weren't there.  I was so bummed out when the person who answered the phone said you had moved to Alabama!  :'(  I guess the whole reason I called you was because I missed talking to you and I still like you.  And I don't think I ever stopped liking you, but I guess I was just scared when I broke up with you.  I mean, you were sweet & cute & considerate, and all the things I'm not used to in a guy [I shudder to think of the kind of guys I was "used to," then].  And another thing you are is a really good friend, and a really good boyfriend...that's another reason I broke up with you.  [Bet that's one he never heard before.  "You're just too awesome; I think we should break up."  Who was I?!]  Because, when you wanted to kiss me and stuff, I got really freaked out, because I'm not really the world's most frequently kissed girl, [Translation - "I've actually never been kissed, but I'm too much of a pansy to admit it] and I'm sorry if that's not really what you want to hear, but oh well; I'm saying it anyway.  Do you have an email address?  [Smooth transition, 14-year-old me.]  Or better yet, call me at my house.  My number is 555-5555.  And, in case you forgot the area code, it's 863!  Please call me, b/c I REALLY need someone to talk to, because my whole family's driving me nuts! [Oh yes, the classic teen angst of "my family doesn't understand me, only you do, boy I barely know at all!"]  Well, I just tried to call back to your old house, because I thought maybe your sister, Nikki, could give me your new number, but I think your grandpa answered.  [Kind of suspect how his sister and grandpa are still in town, if he supposedly moved to Alabama.  Hmmm...]  Then, he asked me where I lived, and I got really scared and hung up.  SO I think I'll just not call that number anymore :)!  Have you changed any since I saw you last?  I have.  (Duh!)  [<That's literally what I wrote in the letter.  So my self-commentating began at a young age.]  Well, I gots 2 go!  Call me or w/b/s.

              -Christina

[First of all, I'm so glad I never mailed this letter.  Second of all, I can't believe I ever dated a guy named Franky in the first place.  The only redeeming quality of this letter - I didn't tell Franky I loved him.  Score.]