August 27, 2000
I am very frustrated this year. Things have changed on the bus and in school, too. All my classes seem unfamiliar [that's because they are, duh!], and the the only classes I can relax in are Chorus and Math. Oh, woe is me! [Let me tell you, the weight of the world is only my shoulders here...] Plus, Casper won't even talk to me unless Malia is there. [That's because he liked Malia, not me. I should have seen the writing on the wall.] No bf either, and no candidate for one. [That changed soon, though. Probably the next day.]
September 25, 2000
I do like someone, but he's not a choice for bf, because he's in average classes. [Obviously, because I'm so selective...] I have something REALLY important to write, but I have to tell you AFTER I get a shower. [On the edge of my seat here.]
Okay, I got a shower and cleaned up my room...sorta. I feel much better now! Anywayz, I had a really bad day today :'( First of all, let me tell you about people in my story so far this year:
Steven - Taran's bf now. He's nice to girls, and tells jokes a lot (or tries to anyway). Total player.Something really depressing happened to me today. [I liked to use that word a lot. It encompassed most of my tumultuous adolescent feelings.] You see, Enid was going out with Manny, and Krista, Laura, and Ashley were all pressuring Enid to hold his hand and kiss him. Finally, Enid got fed up, so she broke up with Manny. They were so mad that they swore they wouldn't talk to Enid, and when Krista found out I was hanging out with Enid, she made Laura promise not to talk to me! I was so depressed! [See? Told you.] Hope I'm not so sad tomorrow.
John - Steven's best friend. Poser. [In hindsight, there were a lot of guys named "John" in my middle school.]
Julio - the guy I like. He's really sweet but really quiet, so I don't know much about him. Plus he's in average classes... [Two thoughts here - 1) the reason he was so quiet was because he didn't really know English, not because he was sweet; and 2) I think I was attracted to quiet, mysterious guys, because then I could imagine they were a lot nicer and more mature than they actually were. Which, when you think about it, is stupid, and girls, you should never do it!]
Taran - I don't really know her anymore. She hasn't talked to me in a LONG time. Oh well. I don't need her. [I was obviously jealous of Taran, because I secretly liked Steven. Just wait and see.]
Tasha - Taran's friend. Really cool. [She's not actually in the story anywhere; I just wanted to give her a shout out.]
Krista - Curses a lot. Likes to make people feel bad. I don't like her! [Although in the previous entry, I had just stood with her in the lunch line and defended her against people bad-mouthing her. Makes perfect sense...]
Laura - Funny, nice, and friendly. A really good person to talk to.
Enid - Hyper, weird, pretty. Sometimes I just can't figure her out! [Sweet Valley nickname. Although, this girl really did remind me of Enid.]
Winston & Manny - Immature boys. [More SVH nicknames. However, weren't all boys immature in middle school? I don't know why I found them to be such massive exceptions.]
Ashley - I have no clue! [That girl was craaaaazy. Although, she's grown up to be a beautiful woman who just recently married a handsomely bearded man. You go, girl.]
October 3, 2000
School sure does take it's toll on me. [Hahaha, I have such a hard life apparently.] I think I might need more attention and more friends now, because I'm in my teens, and I'm supposed to be independent and always doing stuff with my friends, but I'm not. [Oh brother.] I don't have a lot of friends in church [because I was going to a super-legalistic church in Haines City, and I think their parents told them to stay away because my parents were divorced. Like it was contagious or something.] I'm too square [i.e., conservative] for the "cusser gang" at school, but I don't fit in with the "Alpha" kids or the "fashion" club. [Okay, alpha was the highest level of academic classes in middle school, kinda like AP classes in high school. Then you had average classes (lowest level) and the advanced classes (the middle level, or the bourgeois).] The fashion club is my name for Laura, Ashley, Krista, Winston, and Manny, because I don't know how else to describe them. [And also because they were constantly dressed in Abercrombie or Aeropostale.]
Anyways, I need to do more stuff with my friends [want, not need, 12-year-old me], but if I tried to, then my mom might get really depressed [there's that word again], because I might always be asking to go places like my sisters do. Mom gets mad when they do.
I don't know what to do. School has really changed a lot. I told Tasha and Steven I like Julio, but I still haven't talked to him yet. [He wouldn't be able to understand most of what I said, anyway.] Steven and Tasha said I should, but I'm too shy to. Also, Steven and Taran broke up. He's going out with Amanda Keel. I've been thinking about Josh a lot lately. [Reminder - Josh is the guy I dated for a nanosecond in 6th grade. We broke up because of his long arms.] Not every second, but enough to where I know my heart is trying to tell me something. Agggghhh! [Because that's not overdramatic at all.]
October 9, 2000
Okay, I can probably tell you about Julio now. As you've probably already figured out, I have a little (try big) crush on Julio. I've never really talked to him, but that's irrelevant right? [In middle school, yes. Always.]
Guess what? Today in lunch, I sat with Tara because she really wanted me to. She said that she's still hung up on Steven. Aww, ain't that sweet?! [Yeah, not jealous at all here.] Anyways, Julio actually talks at the table now, but only a little. I can't quite figure out if he likes me or not, but I really think he might. He looks at me a lot and smiles, but he hasn't tried to talk to me yet.
On Sunday, I went to church with my mom. I came home, and she told me to do my homework so we could go to Target. I cleaned my room. She told me to do my homework. I vacuumed my room and cleaned out my fan. She told me to do my homework. I cleared off my sliding doors; she told me to do my homework. We washed the dogs. I taped the Sixth Sense. [That was the only scary movie I would ever watch.] She told me to do my homework. I took a shower; she told me to do my homework. I read, ate supper, and brushed my teeth. She didn't say anything. I did my homework. Now my room is really clean, the dogs are washed, and my homework is done! I don't know what the point of that was [me neither], but I do know I have a lot of homework to do tonight. [How does that make sense?!]
October 24, 2000
I'm sorry that I haven't written in awhile; it's just that I've been so busy lately. I literally cannot think about anything but seeing Josh again. I'm over Julio [how did that happen?!], over Casper [not], but still hooked on - you got it - Josh. Where is he?! [Probably at home being normal...unlike me.]
I'm at school early so I can see Josh again. Yesterday, my astrology said I would communicate with someone from an old relationship - Josh! I didn't yesterday, but I hope to today.
He never came. Didn't see him in the halls either. Oh well! [And thus began my stalker days...not creepy at all.]
November 17, 2000
I'm at a friend's house spending the night. I'm sooo tired. [Then why are you awake and writing in your diary??] I still like Manny. [Well, didn't see that one coming.] On Thursday, I was sitting in front of Laura and Ashley in Math. I was writing a note to them about whether or not I should tell him I like him, because I don't want to go out with anyone this year, because of what happened to me and Josh last year. [Obviously, our break-up scarred me for life...?] Plus, Manny is shorter than me, and he is really shy. [Aha! So the truth comes out!]
I am shy too, and even if we went out, we would probably just end up like Manny and Enid (being forced to hold hands in public and kiss, and then breaking up because of it, and never speaking to each other again).
Anyway, so Manny saw part of the note and Ashley asked him something. He said, "No" and his faced turned red. Then Laura said, "Sure, that's what you said about Enid." Then I asked Ashley what she said to him, and she said she had asked him if he wanted to go out with me. Then I said, "Why did you ask him that?" Ashley said he already knows I like him! When I asked her how he knows that, she said that Laura told him. But when I asked Laura, she swore she didn't. [Oh, to get caught spilling your friend's secrets in middle school. You will suffer a fate worse than death itself.] Manny didn't talk to me at all the rest of the day. Oh well. There goes another potential husband down the tube. [Goodness, I was so marriage-minded at such a young age! haha]
I still like Manny, but I'm not gonna go out with him this year. I think I'll wait. [How I handle rejection - denial.]
[So there you have it. The on-going drama of Josh, la historia del Julio, and my brief crush on Manny - who, fun fact, I went to elementary school with, and I'm pretty sure we might have been bf/gf for like a week sometime during then, back when I was shorter and less selective.]
"Probably at home being normal...unlike me."
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:) glad you're still finding these funny!
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